First, send 5 assassins – “Ladybug” (Brad Pitt), “Tangerine” (Aaron Taylor-Johnson), “Lemon” (Brian Tyree Henry), “Wolf” (Benito A Martinez Ocasio aka Bad Bunny), and “The Hornet” (Zazie Beetz) – to a high-speed train to retrieve a suitcase full of money and/or kill or protect – depending on the assassin – the son of a powerful man known as “White Death” (Michael Shannon). Then add a father (Andrew Koji) and a grandfather (Hiroyuki Sanada) looking for revenge, a young girl (Joey King) looking to get noticed, a deadly snake, and a few funny cameos (the director of the movie does an Alfred Hitchcock with a brief cameo – and gets killed). You end up with “Bullet Train”.
Based on the bestselling book written by Kotaro Isaka (if you read it in English it was translated from Japanese by Sam Malissa) and directed by David Leitch (Deadpool 2, Atomic Blonde). Over the course of the train ride from Tokyo to Morioka (and then past Morioka) there’s fights, people getting killed, snake bites, people getting off or on the train (one person gets off and then back on while the high-speed train is running), the briefcase full of money changes hands a few times, and there’s several flashbacks explaining why or how the people on the train got there.
Some characters in the movie think that what happens is based on good luck or bad luck, others think it’s based on which “Thomas the Tank Engine” character you are. I think what happens is based on how much you ignore some large holes in the story (for example: the grandfather somehow makes it to the next train stop of a bullet train – I’m going to guess he coincidentally lives just a short walk away from that stop). Fortunately, there are a lot of funny scenes to distract you, including cameos from the actor and actress that starred in the last movie Brad Pitt was in.
Overall, it’s a VERY violent movie (several people bleed out of their eye sockets) but it’s also a very fun movie.
I give it 7 out of 10 stars.